but just recently. i've been finding myself under a lot of pressure to perform.
especially from my dad.
every 10 minutes or so, if im taking a break from work by blogging, or watchin basketball, or chatting to friends. it'll always be the same thing
STOP PLAYING AND DO YOUR WORK.
and i just crack it.
you know. what is this all for. sitting at my desk staring at textbooks all day tryna get these good results.
and when i do. noooo its still not good enuff. they always try to find a fault in you.
this time i was really happy with my results. did well in almost everythin except for physics which was 53rd/96 people. not bad for your worst subject.
but nooo. my physics is under average. just not acceptable. if i dun do well in physics then i'll bring shame to the family cause my grandfather is a physics professor ==.
sometimes i think parents are so focused on one thing. that they are oblivious to see the effects of it. that one thing. the high UAI.
i work so hard to earn my father's praise but it always seems like i fall short.
and what happens if i do get the UAI in the end. you know. will it be much better. will life be much much better . will sacrificing my adolescence be all worth it
altho in saying that. i have had some good times. but all those things i couldve been doing out there instead of putting my head down and reading word after word of some textbook.
i figured out . that in the end. all we ever work for is money. its how the world works. its run by the ambition for money. money helps us buy things to make our life seem better.
money gives us the incentive to succeed. but it also is the cause of crime, murder,dishonesty.
my mind has gone blank now. so i will end it there
back to a time when there wasnt so much pressure
year 10 formal. that was a really fun night :) basically the first time you saw everyone dressed up and everything and you know. it was kinda a new thing.
lotsa fotos. lotsa dancing.
the grade seemed to be really together too and overall . it was a good night
One thing you have to realise is that parents [especially migrant parents] from my experience anyways always expect so much from us cause of the things they had to go through to get where they are [I mean to a lot of parents simply moving out of their home country is big]. So they expect perfection from us. At the end of the day all you can do is smile and just nod your head whenever they say something cause as long as your happy with how your going then things should be alright. I might have completely missed the point of your blog, but this is just my two cents =)
ReplyDelete8-)
ReplyDeleteObviously we have completely different parents. Mine are not uptight at all.
*patpat*
Just try your best, they just want you to aim high. I'm sure they are proud of you. Also, acquired knowledge cannot be passed onto the offspring, as there needs to be mutations in the gametes for that to happen. :D BIO!
and. um phys sucks. 8-)
I'm sure your parents are proud of you, but I think they just want to keep pushing you to achieve more and more because they know you can. That's what parents are for.
ReplyDeleteThroughout my junior years I used to come home with bad reports and get owned by my parents and even though I resented them at the time, to be honest I think it helped me to try harder and do even better.
When it comes down to it, I'm sure they'll be really really proud of you at the end of this year.
And I realised I'm in almost all of your "memories" photos.
My parents say the same thing. Along the lines of "you're not going to get into medicine" and all that. Just zone out and focus on what YOU want :)
ReplyDeleteAlso change the font of your whole blog. This font sucks.